Vanilla sex has always turned me off. I look for something deeper. That's why I reinvented myself as fetish practitioner. You can have sex and feel absolutely nothing. That's so heteronormative for it to be 'put penis in vagina and cum'. For me, sex is erotica.
Whenever my job is mentioned in newspapers, blogs, or magazines, the same tropes tend to pop up: moral panic, drug abuse, violence. Journalists quote us selectively, so that it sounds as if we’re living out the sex-negative, whorephobic stereotypes the public are used to consuming.
I still remember I was so pumped in my first booking that the client had to tell me to calm down haha. It felt so easy and natural for me so I kept doing it. But it wasn’t until after several months into it that I fully comprehended the value of what I provide.
It’s not all about wheelchairs - chronic pain, neurodiversity, and mental health are all relevant too, and learning to talk with clients about what they need and how they experience pleasure is essential.