This would be like telling an Americans client your hotel is next to Starbucks.

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Years ago ….

I’m on my first ever Scotland tour.
I’m feeling confident, powerful even.
I always give out a location next to the hotel for safety.

I told this lovely person that my hotel was next to …. Greggs. 💀💀💀💀

Thank goodness he found it charming not idiotic.

If I was your girl believe me
I'd turn on the Rollin' Stones
We could groove along and feel much better
Let me in
I could do it forever and ever and ever and ever

This didn’t have to be so accurate 🥲

What Your Favorite Sad Dad Band Says About You - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

If you had to decide on a city during a February road trip … which would it be ?

Having a friend get lost in Meow Wolf is like LARPing House of Leaves

I asked if this place had iced coffee- they said yes
And just poured hot regular coffee over ice 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲

If your morning isn’t full of conversation with a wonderful friend, Madonna blaring from a TV, while eating spicy af breakfast burritos in Albuquerque

You aren’t living your best life

You know you are in college town when they have an insomnia cookie and pita pit.

🍔Can’t wait to meat you 🍔

DC 1/19-24
Richmond 1/24-26

You have one guess as to who is in possession of a 32oz cold brew ( w/ oat milk for color not flavour) and a newly minted 750 hour Death Doula Certificate 🙌🏻🙌🏻

I am wearing a perfume called Slow Explosions to bed and it’s a delight

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