'Sex work is an eye-opener in the way that it helped elevate my confidence and gave me more reasons to appreciate my body, my beauty, and my sense of self-worth.'
What’s it like starting out now, when ads have shifted from the back pages of the local paper to almost exclusively online? When everyone talks about being ‘on brand’ and a social media presence is essential?
I am a New York City-based dominatrix and cultural activist. I started doing BDSM professionally in 2016 after finding a dungeon on craigslist (those were the days) and then mostly did online work for a year or two while I finished college before transitioning to full-time in-person BDSM.
I thought I’d had a plenitude of sexual experience when I started—I... had a sex blog where I would write about OKCupid and Craigslist hookups—but most of those encounters were things I was hazing myself through.
When it comes to sex work, there’s no shortage of lessons to be learned about oneself, including what “sex”, “work” or even what the term “yourself” actually means. I’d have to say that it’s mostly taught me that there's no wrong or right answer.