I am a New York City-based dominatrix and cultural activist. I started doing BDSM professionally in 2016 after finding a dungeon on craigslist (those were the days) and then mostly did online work for a year or two while I finished college before transitioning to full-time in-person BDSM.
I’ve been a sex worker for so long now that sometimes I wonder which parts of my high femme identity are things I do because of work, and which parts are due to my work.
'There’s a lot of hate in this world but through sex work – and I’m talking specifically about companionship – we create such a loving intimate space for people, free of judgment.'
"BDSM to me is about taking a part or parts of ourselves and blowing them up to be our entire existence in this nonlinear moment of time. This might include aspects of ourselves that may be buried and that we often do not fully understand."
I kind of always knew I was going to end up in the sex industry, to be honest. I became sexually active at a very young age and, despite growing up in a small, conservative New Jersey town, never seemed to possess any internalized shame around my desires.